The Better Barrier

When we hear the word barrier, what often comes to mind is an impenetrable wall. More to the point, the word barrier is used in the context of something that must be overcome or broken down.

There’s an upside to barriers that is rarely discussed and an integral component of both a personal and professional strategy. For those new to my writings, a personal or professional strategy is a well-thought-out approach designed to achieve one’s goals.

A critical component of my Acceleration Seminar and my Headspace Seminar is this: Barriers can and should be “installed” to block any external noise that can distract you from reaching and achieving your goals.

Today we’re going to discuss a distractor that lives in the shadows and is cause for a barrier. This distractor – for many, is a foot on the brake of achievement. It’s called a Social Sham, and in short, it’s a rather bombastic post you would see on a social media venue, or in the physical form, someone who can’t stop telling just how much better their life is than yours. Consider the following social media example:

“Like OMG…I have the greatest husband EVER! He made me breakfast in bed, did the laundry, and then had a limo pick me up and take me to the day spa! And it’s not even a special occasion. My life is SOOO much better than yours!!!”

Social media is a breeding ground for posts that would lead you to believe that everyone else’s life is absolutely perfect, and yours is, well, much less than perfect. What you have to remember is that social media is a highlight reel of someone’s life.

Here’s what I’d like you to consider: If someone is going to go out of their way to to tell the world how WONDERFUL things are in their backyard, then chances are that there’s more to the story (and it’s probably not so pretty). Think about it for a minute: To make a conscious decision that involves writing out a post – attached with a photo of the breakfast that hubby made and delivered to that person in bed, requires work. There was nothing spontaneous, rather – it was premeditated. It may very well be that the individual who uploaded the post is creating a smoke screen for a life that isn’t “soooo wonderful.”

Regardless of the intent, Social Sham tends to make individuals feel inferior. Feeling inferior is not conducive to moving forward with any degree of velocity. The solution isn’t necessarily to disconnect from social media or detour from those who can’t help but throw their WONDERFUL lives in your face. The better solution is to put up a firm barrier that simply has you do the following:

Avoid looking at posts from certain individuals, regardless of their content.

Avoid individuals who’s underlying intention is to make themselves feel better by making YOU feel worse.

If you can’t avoid individuals who just love giving you a tour of their incredible life, then approach the situation knowing that, at some point, the curtain will come down and the truth will be known. It never fails.

Now I realize that many individuals reading this article will say something along the lines of “I am HAPPY for other people’s success and I love hearing about it” (that’s a lie) OR “I don’t let that sort of thing bother me…I know it’s BS!” (also a lie). It goes against human nature to enjoy someone else’s good news. You know it and I know it, and like it or not – it bothers everyone.

You can’t stop an insecure, fragile person from throwing their plastic life at you. It’s how they operate, and it is what it is. What you CAN do is shield yourself from things that you can’t unhear, and can’t unsee. It’s far easier to avoid something that is an unnecessary distractor than it is to deal with it after the fact.

Have A GREAT Day!

…Dr. Marc – The Dark Lord Of Strategy

Leave a Reply